MN BIPOC Emerging Writer Award

Hello Dear Reader!

I struggle, like most writers, with confidence in my craft. Many days, I hate the words that come out of my brain. Even if others tell me the stories are great, that breath of doubt still whispers through my synapses. And it doesn’t feel like it’s going anywhere, anytime soon. 

When one of my critique groups shared the information for the Minnesota BIPOC Emerging Writer award, I figured I would enter on whim and get rejected just for the hell of it. Gain the writer experience. Grow some hair on my chest. 

I entered a piece of flash fiction that I’d written that fall for a project I am not going to talk about yet (just know that it holds an extremely special place in my heart). I loved the piece when I wrote it. I loved the rhythm and the poetry. And mostly, I loved that it felt like me. 

So I read over the story, wrote a cover letter with mistakes in it, and submitted. Again, I never in all the worlds and all their creatures thought I would win, but I still refreshed my email for the next week, expecting to see a rejection. 

A few months later, I see the dreaded email. I steel myself for rejection, knowing without a doubt that I was not good enough. Then when I read the header, my heart dropped into my stomach. 

I’d won. 

I’d actually won. 

The afterward is now a blur. I cried. I called my mom. I sat in stunned silence for over an hour, just willing the news to set in. Even now, months later, the surprise still hasn’t worn off. 

If you are interested in reading THUNDER GONE FIRE, you find it in the Blue Earth Review issue 32 and on their website. Slowly but surely, I am learning to celebrate my wins. I hope you shout to the stars when it’s your turn. 

Until Next Time, 
Tonja K. Johnson